Atari's Asshat

This was inevitable, wasn't it? A new level of douchery. I present... Atari's Speakerhat.



Bluetooth speakers built into a baseball cap. Actually looks kinda decent. Could become a hit, but I hope nobody will buy (or publicly use) it.

 

I've seen people walking around the grocery store listening to music directly out of their phone's speaker. If the music sounded less screechy and terrible I would probably hate them a little bit less.

 

Add 3 more speakers and a little subwoofer and you'll have a 5.1 hat.

 

I'm too lazy to construct a joke out of it, but just make the subwoofer a bluetooth enabled vibrating buttplug and call it a day alright?

 

As a self proclaimed snob douchebag, I'll wait for the Stax version

 

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00KDGBT8S/ref=cm_cr_srp_mb_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

I wrote a review:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/review/B00KDGBT8S/RYAOA4I5OPK84?ref_=glimp_1rv_cl

 

Haha, that watch is awesome! I am seriously thinking about grabbing both, the watch and the hat, to wear for the next hifi show

 

What would the Apple version be?

A boombox beanie with turtle neck collar sub woofers which work via Bluetooth and wireless charging.

I am happy my headphones properly isolate.

 

It should be lawful to defenestrate anyone using one of these in public. It's bad enough seeing the inbreds listening to reggaeton via their phone speakers on public transport (apparently you're not allowed to take and stomp their phones, sadly).

 

You would be king of the show.

Mix this in too. Sound activated:

LED Sound Activated E-Q Raver T-Shirt (Large) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0045LX74Q/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_bxHCzb8SBDQMD